A Personal Story
She looked up the wall again staring back at The smiling faces that were framed and placed in a position of importance as if to say. "Our kids are outstanding and we are so blessed that they are ours". Her heart sank she wondered why her parents didn't love her as much as her friends' parents love them, why weren't her photos up on the wall of her parent's house? What was so special about her friends and not about her. Even though it troubled her she couldn't help but look at them. She internalized how she felt and never once asked the questions that were forming in her heart and mind. She just felt sad, confused, and unimportant. She made note of how she felt and vowed that when she was a mother that she would have pictures on the walls of her home showcasing her family especially her children. She wanted to make sure they knew that they were more valuable than priceless art or expensive collectibles. That they were worth more and loved so much more.
That little girl was me...And you bet I have photos of my son on my wall, framed and shown in a place of honor and respect. I wouldn't ever want one day to pass by that he even once thought, felt the things I did.
What Psychologists Have to Say
You love your kiddos and the last thing you need is more mom guilt...I get it I have it big time, At night especially, going over the day and wondering if I just messed my son up for life... It's not logical. But with all the things we have coming at us it hard not to question ourselves. Raising a tiny wild human can be challenging for sure but that never wipes away all the love you feel. My goal is to help you show your kids the importance they have in your family. Believe me, my parents loved me very much, and if I would have said something about the photos of my friends on the walls they would have hung them up in an instant. But I didn't, so it left me feeling less loved than I actually was. Sometimes it's the things we don't do (not realizing it) that affect our kids. So the next time you have a photo session ask yourself this very important question. Where do I want to display these images so my family can see them and feel all the love they deserve.
Psychologists have found that printed photos hung in the home increase self-confidence in a child. David Krauss a licensed psychologist in Ohio says " I think it is really important to show a family as a family unit. It is so helpful for children to see themselves as a valued and important part of that family unit."
Judy Wiser a Psychologist and art therapist states "It lets children learn who they are and where they fit. They learn their genealogy and the uniqueness of their own family and its story. When a child sees a family portrait with them included in the photograph they say to themselves"these people have me as a part of what they are, that's why I belong here. This is where I come from."
There is also a difference between Digital images on a computer and on the wall. Dr. Krauss says "I'm very conservative about self-esteem and I think placing a family photo someplace in the home where the child can see it every day without having to turn on a device or click around on a computer to find it really hits home. For that child, this is a sense of reassurance and comfort. They have a certainty about them and a protecting quality that nurtures a child. It lets them know where they are in the pecking order and that they are loved and cared for."
When I heard this what I experienced as a child made absolute sense to me and I hope to help shine a light on this for families so that their children can feel the acceptance, love, and security that walking by images every day can bring.
Ok mom you got this! You are amazing! If you are worried the images won't work with your newly decorated home, Don't because we actually design our photo sessions around your home design. In turn creating a beautiful, fun work of art of your family that is specifically curated to hang in your beautifully decorated home.
Tell me in the comments how you show off your kids' images!
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